Tuesday, June 15, 2004

***
Scaredy Cat part 2

Time Check : 2215 hrs (SG)

Time Check : 0015 hrs (estimated- Guam)

Really hoped that he'll call me but its already so late over there. Maybe he's asleep? Too tired from training? Or he's so engrossed watching his Tv programmes?

I always get so paranoid when i can't get him or get to talk to him. I've no idea why i've became such a paranoia nervous wreck whenever he goes on his trips.

Felt a twinge of sadness when i heard Kris talking to her fiance about what time to meet.... going out... planning their new home etc. It remains me of the time at the beginning of our relationship where everything is lovey dovey and we spend every single moment together...

And at this time when i needed support the most( stupid course that i'm on- super shag. mentally and physically), he is not around. Not that i blame him , but i think that this is the worst timing of the times we are together. I really needed to talk to him , to tell him about my day, to hear his voice, to let him know how badly i miss him.

I really do MISS him. And very Badly.

Signs that i am missing him terribly:

1. There is a sour twinge in my heart whenever i think that he is not around.
2. I carry the photo we took in CMC ( Happiest Pic) around. From bunk to home, home to bunk.
3. The smell of the T-shirt he wore to sleep before he left makes me feel comforted ( as if he is still around in town)
4. Looking at the watch during daytime hoping that 2000/2100hrs(SG time) will come soon so that i can hear his voice.
5. Rushing home and doing everything with the mobile always with me in case i miss his call.
6. No mood to go out with friends. (And i mean really NO MOOD)
7. Looking at the Shamrock in camp and tears wells up....
8. Crying while driving when i heard a particular chinese song that goes " Are u getting used to not sleeping on my arm as a pillow(direct translation)" That is how we sleep everynight! *cryZ*
9. Talking to the furkids to unwind.
10. And everything seems to go cuckoo when he is not around!!! (refer to the previous post.)

Its 2230 now. Think he must be asleep. Think he is not going to call. I better go study for my test tomorrow and to sleep soon.


R4 CoUnTdoWn: 11 MoRe DaYz To Go!

Monday, June 14, 2004

***

Scaredy Cat part 1

This is very interesting.

I think nobody knows that i have an online diary.

Or rather people forgot about it.
Hahahahahhaha

Today i did a very silly thing.

I dropped my car key down the rubbish chute! Was carrying the furkids'rubbish and i don't even know i threw it down. Till when i was walking to the lift and then to my horror of horrors..... The car key is gone.

To cut a long story short. In the end $60 solved the problem and me having 2 extra spare keys .

And the original spare key is inside the car.... sigh.

Wanted to cry very badly ( but the tears can't come out)coz it seem to me that when ever he's not around... either i screw things up or things screw me up.

Like the hammie's leaking water bottle.
The Monster Torts' choked filter.
The VERY SCREWED up Euro CUp 04 1st 4 matches.

SIGH...

My only consolation is that he'll call everyday and i only have around 15 mins to update him on whatever that happened. And i really hoped that it can be longer. But he wanna save money.... so.... :(

I hate it when:
1. I can't get him whenever i wanted.
2. When he only have limited time to chat with me.
3. Everytime he goes GUAM! All the beach parties n babes .... whereas i'm stuck in boring S'pore... SIgh...

Really home he comes home soon... But till then.....

R4 CoUnTdoWn: 12 MoRe DaYz To Go!